Monday 3:45 a.m. - Alarm goes off. Beep Beep Beep. Hitting snooze is not an option.
4:40 a.m.- Leave for airport. Coffee in hand.
5:35 a.m. - Security is so darn slow in Wausau that we have to move to the front so we don't miss our flight. People at the front of the line aren't happy with us.
5:40 a.m.- Security runs my pump through 4 times. I was seriously thinking they were going to make me demonstrate with it. Um no.
5:45 a.m. - Damien tries to go through security but forgets his cell phone in his pocket- TWICE. Has to get hand patted.
5:50 a.m.- After I put my 4 buckets through security (Bucket 1- shoes, belt, coat, toiletries. Bucket 2-pump Bucket 3- laptop Bucket 4-laptop bag then my suitcase) I pick up my suitcase to put everything back in and the zipper breaks. I guess after 400 flights it was bound to die sometime. My trusty old Samsonite. I got a little tear in my eye when it went kaput.
6:00 a.m.- I walk to the gate carrying my broken suitcase like a small child. The gate agent hands me a black Hefty bag. Chuck it all in and gate check it to Chicago.
7:00 a.m.- Arrive in Chicago. Deplane in the rain onto the tarmac and grab my wet garbage bag.
7:10 a.m. - Go to Brookstone and drop a benjamin on a lime green suitcase. I know you're jealous!
7:20 a.m.- Try to figure out where to leave an empty suitcase at O'Hare so I won't get pummeled by security. "Unattended bag left by gate F7- GET THE REDHEAD!!' Luckily the nice gentleman at Brookstone took care of it for me.
7:30 a.m.- $10 coffee from Starbucks never tasted so good. Oh yeah- I got the venti.
8:00 a.m. - Delayed in Chicago waiting for a crew change. I can't remember what time we left Chicago.
2:something- Arrive in Portland, Maine. It's rainy and cold. Just like WI. Welcome to the Eastern Time Zone.
3:00 p.m.- Arrive at the hotel.
3:05 p.m.- Change clothes and try to get pretty.
3:30 p.m.- Grab cab to head to downtown Portland for meeting.
4:00 p.m.- 8:30 p.m.- Meetings and dinner. Ok- Dinner was fantastic. Really the one bright spot of the trip. Fresh scallops. And this dark chocolate, caramel, peanut butter torte with cinnamon ice cream. Whoa! The way to my heart and positive attitude is through food!
9:00 p.m. - Back at the hotel- exhausted. Found myself watching the Bachelor thinking 'What are you doing woman- go to bed!
Tuesday - No April foolin'
6:00 a.m. - Up and ready to go.
4:05 p.m.- Damien tells me that he brought the dinosaurs back to a little boy who was crying. He overheard his mom talking on the phone "Oh he's so sick. He's been throwing up and has horrible diarrhea'. As we went up the escalator Damien recounted this story and said, "And then I smelled it. Kid could care less about the dinosaurs when his drawers are full" See- someone is always worse off than you.
4:45 p.m. - I'm the last one to get on the plane. The gate agent looks at my boarding pass and tells me I wasn't screened properly. Oh come on!! So back to security I go for the pat down, bag swab, luggage rustling urine sample and blood test.
5:00 p.m. - Depart for Baltimore.
6:00 p.m. - Arrive Baltimore. Have to go outside of security to check into Midwest Express. Thrilled.
6:01 p.m. - Find out Midwest Express's computers are down. Can't check in. It's 2008 people. Do you have a disaster relief plan? You have to have some kind of back up.
7:00 p.m. - Get a handwritten boarding pass from the agent. After standing in line for an hour.
7:05 p.m. - Go back through security with my 4 buckets. I'm so done dressing and undressing!
8something- It's eerily quiet at the airport.
8:15 p.m. - Board the plane for Milwaukee.
9:25 p.m. - Land in Milwaukee. Haul tail to our Wausau flight since it leaves at 9:55.
I don't care anymore time - Land in Wausau.
10:55 p.m. - Jam out to some Taylor Swift in the car.
11:40 p.m.- My head hits the pillow. Home sweet home!